‘Twas an afternoon & night when even penguins would’ve thought twice about venturing out, yet there we were, the brave souls of Alltrust, migrating en masse toward the promise of warmth, wine, and what would prove to be the most talked-about pre-roasted hog this side of the North Pole.
The evening began with what can only be described as an Olympic-worthy dash from office to our party venue, with previously dignified professionals performing impressive sprints in festive wear, their breath forming small clouds of determination in the Arctic air. One couldn’t help but wonder if this was actually a cleverly disguised team-building exercise!
Inside, the transformation from winter wasteland to wonderland was immediate. The bar vouchers appeared like golden tickets, immediately elevating their holders to Wonka-level status. “I’ll trade you two drink tokens for your secret about how you actually achieved those Q4 numbers,” was overheard more than once.
The feast was laid out before us like a mediaeval banquet, the pre-roasted hog taking pride of place among the spread. But it was the innocent-looking bottle of Naga Viper chilli sauce that would prove to be the evening’s dark horse. While most of us wisely treated it with the same caution one might show a sleeping dragon, Lorna, James, and Will stepped forward as our resident daredevils. What followed was a master class in bravado, followed by what can only be described as interpretive dance meets involuntary yoga. Their red faces and watering eyes earned them instant legendary status, though some suspect their taste buds may never forgive them.
Then came the awards ceremony, that beautiful time when we celebrate excellence while simultaneously creating a year’s worth of conversation fodder. The winners graciously accepted their accolades, though some suspicious throat-clearing suggested they were already warming up for what was to come.
As night fell, the karaoke machine emerged like a siren calling sailors to their doom. What followed was nothing short of spectacular – a parade of hidden talents and deeply buried confidence, fueled by liquid courage and festive spirit. We witnessed everything from passionate power ballads to rap performances that would make Eminem raise an eyebrow (though perhaps not in admiration). The takeaway performance of the evening (apparently) was Dave, Maddie, Vicky and Chloe performing Coolio’s classic Gangstars Paradise!
By the end of the night, several universal truths had emerged:
- Nobody actually knows all the words to “Fairytale of New York”
- The person who invented bar vouchers deserves their own holiday
- Even in sub-zero temperatures, there’s always that one colleague who insists they “don’t feel cold”
- Nothing reveals hidden personality traits quite like karaoke song selection
- Naga Viper sauce should come with its own warning label and waiver form
As we ventured back into the cold, armed with new stories, slightly tighter waistbands, and the warm glow of both community and complimentary wine, one thing was clear: the Alltrust Christmas party had once again proved that sometimes the best memories are made when you’re trying not to freeze (and your mouth is on fire).
And yes, there’s video evidence of both the karaoke performances and the Great Chilli Challenge floating around somewhere. Some traditions never die, they just go viral in Whatsapp groups!